Perspective

I guess we all need a little perspective every now and again. I haven't been myself as of late you see, physically and mentally.

If anything good has come of this, its that I no longer think and plan in such frivolous detail. There isn't a point, it just results in unnecessary stress. I am enjoying the present, because the future is uncertain.

I don't know anything yet, results are yet to be verified and double checked and locked down diagnosis, but I'd rather prepare myself for the worst and then be relieved if it isn't the case, than thinking it'll all be okay then be pulled crashing down, and spiraling into darkness rather than easing myself into it.

So yeah, perspective. The little things don't matter anymore, but at the same time they mean the world. The things that bug me don't anymore, and the smallest of sparkles of happiness really make my day.

People wish and pray for all the bad things in their lives, and indeed the world to dissapear. I think this is wrong. You might say that "broccoli doesnt affect the taste of chocolate", but the great taste of chocolate would not be so great if it was normalized, if there was nothing to contrast it. By reducing the contrast of things, they do not become complety light, they are neutralized to grey.

Applying this, we learn that its impossible to achieve true total perfection. Imperfection is infact completely necessary. Without imperfection, we cannot see perfection. We cannot appreciate the little things, and indeed the big things without the unwanted, imperfect things.

Whatever will be, will be. All I can do is value what I have, and accept what I don't. Meanwhile, I'm doing the things I might not get a chance to, hence the knitting.

"All Hallows eve" & Alcohol

I spent the 31st at a church worship event. It was brilliant, fuel for creative fires all in the name of JC himself. I plucked away at Dakota (Delta Blue 5-String banjo) and she appeared to be quite an attraction and conversation piece.

So anyways, the eve is drawing closer, and I was meant to be going trick-or-treating with my friends I hadn't seen barely since the sunshine months. I find the concept of going round your neighbours of whom you barely nod at in the street (if you recognise them at all that is) and asking for ghastly themed confectionary somewhat odd. I decided to bail out and simply meet them later at the after party/gathering fuelled by alcohol and music I infrequently recognised.

Before I left CC, the churchy thing, I was talking to fellow Christians about what they were planning on proceeding to do thiseve. This brought about the discussion of Halloween. As a matter of fact, it is somewhat frowned upon in the Christian society. I was aware of it before but i figured it was one of those unspoken guidelines nobody pays attention to except those kebabbed by wooden poles up their exits. I don't know where i stand on it if I'm honest.

Zipping to later, I'm at the gathering. It's been a while since I have consumed alcoholic beverages, and it had escaped my memory of how pathetically tiny my liver is. I needn't elaborate further. All I know is that I woke up at around 4am in a pac-man ghost costume (pinky) and haven't been able to use my vocal chords since.

I used photographs, videos and text messages to piece together what became of my evening, and I am proud to say it was not me that half broke off the bumper of the dudes mothers truck of whom hosted the event. I will always eternally love the one that brought me a bacon sandwich when I woke up.
If I am to take anything from this, its that Mint Baileys does not mix well with Iron Bru.