Perspective

I guess we all need a little perspective every now and again. I haven't been myself as of late you see, physically and mentally.

If anything good has come of this, its that I no longer think and plan in such frivolous detail. There isn't a point, it just results in unnecessary stress. I am enjoying the present, because the future is uncertain.

I don't know anything yet, results are yet to be verified and double checked and locked down diagnosis, but I'd rather prepare myself for the worst and then be relieved if it isn't the case, than thinking it'll all be okay then be pulled crashing down, and spiraling into darkness rather than easing myself into it.

So yeah, perspective. The little things don't matter anymore, but at the same time they mean the world. The things that bug me don't anymore, and the smallest of sparkles of happiness really make my day.

People wish and pray for all the bad things in their lives, and indeed the world to dissapear. I think this is wrong. You might say that "broccoli doesnt affect the taste of chocolate", but the great taste of chocolate would not be so great if it was normalized, if there was nothing to contrast it. By reducing the contrast of things, they do not become complety light, they are neutralized to grey.

Applying this, we learn that its impossible to achieve true total perfection. Imperfection is infact completely necessary. Without imperfection, we cannot see perfection. We cannot appreciate the little things, and indeed the big things without the unwanted, imperfect things.

Whatever will be, will be. All I can do is value what I have, and accept what I don't. Meanwhile, I'm doing the things I might not get a chance to, hence the knitting.