It's always the night time which is worst. My brain fires up and attempts to decimate all that is perfect in my life thus far by tugging at the loose threads to unravel the eudimonic factors that contribute to my overall happiness meter. I can fight fire with fire and simply blast over the noise with the likes of Stornoway or Sam Gray, but the fact is I seek out trouble. If something is perfect, then something must be wrong, because perfection is fiction (or at least in this earthy realm).
I spent the entire day reading. Looking for Alaska by John Green is one of those books that literally catapults you into the novel, and traveling to and from Alabama (the American state in which it is set) simply gives one jet-lag, therefore by staying in longer sittings is overall, easier. After I had read the last word, I immediately had to keep myself busy, and as a result, Blitzed my bedroom and cut out yet more of my past self, of which is now sitting in bin bags in the kitchen. I dislike looking back on my past self, so its easier to remove it. Instead, I am one to look forward, fastforward even so far ahead that I get lost for hours in my own vivid daydreams. This habit has caused me to overlook and miss tremendous details in my present, and thus has been self-deemed as something I may need to reduce doing.
If I can remember anything in life, its things which are either menial and irrelevant, some would say completely useless, or extreme epiphany-provoking moments or words or phrases. For example, in L.f.A, the word "inedible" is typed four times in the entire book, three of which inside the nickname "McInedible" in reference to a self revealing fast food chain. By memory alone I can tell you that one of the book's more well known (and in my opinion, best) quotes is situated near the bottom of Page 88. But it was page 54, in the middle that is etched in my mind the deepest. It makes everything make sense, and explains my lesser desire to plan for the future now than approximately 8 months ago. If you know me at all, you will know what's changed since then. The beautifully accurate philosophy of page 54 reveals all.
And yes, I did have a very merrily Christmas.
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