Here Comes the Sun

I had my first serious exam thismorn. It's fair to say I died inside. As far as English goes, for a dyslexic, I'm pretty tank at it. Give me something to argue for or against and I'll blab my way to an asterisk, and as for creative writing and poetry I have ideas and opinions coming out of my ears. Books? If I'm not reading them for pleasure, I despise them. I swear blind they haven't changed the syllabus in at least fifty years. So, studying two shockingly dull "novels" for two years couldn't get much worse.. Right? Wrong. They expect you to answer two questions for 60% of your total mark, both worth 30 marks, on two of the most painfully generic questions that AQA could think of. It's like they spent five minutes thinking it up so they could all leave the office and go out for drinks. This forced me to have to write down in scrupulous detail every possibility and aspect of the book that could get me the marks I needed to not fail. I doubt I succeeded. After the exam, I resentfully went to graphics revision for an hour, then gave up and ran away to my friends house. I stopped by the garage and bought two magnums, and we layed on her front lawn engorging ourselves, soaking up the unusually warm sunlight considering the past week was all cloud and grey. After re-gaining my faith in humanity, I ambled back to school to sneak on the schoolbus home, to which I was greeted by fellow classmates letting loose with Jack Johnson blasting out the tin-sounding speakers on their mobile devices. It seems that I have not yet accepted the fact that things are only going to get worse in the next few weeks, but it was nice how karma could pick the day back up so I will be slowly eased into exams, stress, and heat. At lest its my birthday on Saturday.

Surreal

I left high school today. I mean, i go back in tomorrow for Celebration Day (all the year 11s run round in fancy dress and eat BBq, weather providing) so i am going back to the building/grounds, but every classroom i left whilst counting down lessons, i couldnt help but think, "maaan, im never going to set foot in this room again..". Bar a few, today's last lessons consisted of throwing paper airplanes, writing in leavers books, and taking many photographs. Many of which i am pulling demonic faces so i didnt have to suffer the embarrasment of trying to smile and a mugshot being captured instead. Might aswell cut out the middle man, right?

It's going to be odd leaving. I mean, i spent 5 years of my life there. One whole third. It's the place where i made the transition from child to young adult, began to find out who i am, and met some amazing people of whom i will never forget. If anyone is reading this who is my classmate, school-friend or other who was envolved in my school-life, i thank you for making it the blessed memory that it will always remain in my mind.

My brother is home. In pain, but home. Bless him.

"Don't panic, but.."

Well today has been a little bundle of horrible supprises now hasn't it?

I woke up to an empty house. It took me half an hour of being awake to realise this, as i am usually the first person awake, however as i routinely went into the kitchen, an ominous note was left for me by my mother.

"Don't panic, but i've had to take Ben to A&E. Get yourself off to school. Love Ma' x."

What was i supposed to do? Father was nowhere to be seen (presumably on a buisness trip or something) and, to my horror, i had to make my own sandwiches for lunch. I sumberged myself into the indie folk of Stornoway to calm me down, and as always, i went to catch the bus.

Fastforward to 4.15pm. I had just said my goodbyes to the wonderful Art Department staff at my school. I handed in my exam project, beaming. I no longer had a reason to set foot in M08 ever again. It was a sad event, but also an almost liberating feeling. I left my home-from-home, and ambled my way to the late bus. Sat down at the back, earphones in, then checked my phone. Three misssed calls from my father, and a voicemail. The first word that came to mind was explicit. The voicemail was crackily, but from what i could gather, my brother had to have an operation of some sorts. Again, explicit words came to mind. Whatever it was for, it went well. But i still burst into tears, to the bemusement of my schoolmates.

Fastforward to arriving home. I still couldn't get my head around it. We were sparring kung fu style only the previous evening. Well, whatever, I have to go up the hospital tonight to see him possibly, if they don't let him out, which they still might. I'm being optamistic. I hate hospitals.

Procrastination.

Exams are on the horizon. The last of coursework is being handed in this friday. I have three days left of school, including when we dress up and run riot for the last day. I plan to glitter-bomb everything in sight whilst dressed as a Leprechan. Can't wait.

When I write it like that it all sounds so melodramatic, but in my somewhat small shoes, it is all rather a big ordeal. Excitememnt has morphed into anxiety, and back into eager jitters for the unknown. I've been distracting myself by burying my head in music, learning reems of lyrics through turquoise tint glasses, and dabbiling as always on my (conveniently but not planned same shade of turquoise) soprano uke. Despite my ever-hardening fingertips, the cheesewire strings of my dear Dakota slice my fingers open far too frequently. I am however now fully adapted to tuning her by ear. Well, after all, it is only GDGBD..

So whilst the nylon strings of Savannah are frequently creating resonance in her plywood body, my vocal chords also sing out as descretely as possible, in fear of being heard by beings through my bedroom floor. Unknown to my parents, I have been secretly doing one-off performantces in various places and small events around my hometown, mainily taking Electra with me (she has the advantage of being an electro-acousic so where amplifyers are available i can take full advantage). The most popular of which being my cover of Hey Soul Sister where I transposed it down a semitone so it was within my range in my diseased state. Common colds suck.

I am booked into Newday, and have a yearning for swinging among tree-tops. Albie needs a bath, so i shall sign off. Vale.

All in Half a Years work.

Again, I forgot the existence of my blog. Whoops. Much has happened. Albie is larger, I have a website, and more examinations have come and past. The end of my compulsary Education is nigh. What scares the hell out of me (appart from re-creations of living specimens) is the fact that I chose to throw myself into the wider world. Moving out of a village school to the town was hard enough, now it's the full blown city! And this time I will know even less people. Just one. I'll have to make friends or something... So, I spoke of Newday before. I shall hopefully be booking in this year extremely soon. I revel in the memories of the atmosphere of it. The worship, the people, and the spiritual feeling afterwards. It's just.. Magnificent. Hopefully I shall not leave it so long next time, so that I don't blather on meaninglessly. S'laters. URL to my online portfolio - Www.wix.com/pinchypinch/portfolio